Join for FREE | Take the Tour Lost Password?
Shop deviantART for the
holidays and save BIG!
Click here! :holly:
[x]

deviantART

:flirty:
 


separated by oceans of stars, we are worlds
apart; but i take solace
knowing that you watch the same night sky
as i-

did you see that comet tail
igniting my hopes?
burning brilliantly before being doused
in the serenity of the night.
i only wish that we see eye to eye,
fly and shine brightly together
until we are reclaimed by the heavens.

you come to me in my dreams
like a siren you call me in my sleep;
but i awake to nothing but sweat and tears,
with your warmth lingering on my cheek.
at that moment we were one;
despite the distance
we were the sea shore and the tide-
and i was ever receding from you.

i cannot reach you from afar,
my hands are mistlike,
never grasping onto you-
as i am, you can breathe me in
like the morning air,
then at least we can be as one
if only for a moment.

light years apart, i will still yearn for you
and wait for your reply.
i know words don't travel through empty space,
but i hope emotions transcend this vastness
on my bed of dreams.
©2009 ~sto67
:iconsto67:

Author's Comments

sometimes there are distances which cannot be covered and all you seem to do is drift away even when you try your best.

Critique welcome.

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconcool4dude:
The first stanza conjures up too much imagery that I connect to that cartoon movie with the mouse that immigrated to America, An American Tale I think it was called? With Fivel? Beyond that, it seems a tad genericy, you could almost just start off from the second stanza, which I think has much better wording and imagery. From there on, I have relatively no complaints, and rather enjoyed the poem.

--
:cheese: Somebody should go stand with the cheese...it's alone :cheese:

Details

April 5
1.2 KB

Statistics

1
1 [who?]
42 (0 today)
0 (0 today)

Site Map